Sunday, September 5, 2010

One Thought, Two Thoughts, Red Thought, New Thoughts.

I want a new mind.
Prepackaged and sold on sale.
Mass produced.
I want new thoughts.
one dimensional and full of color.
Easily Amused.
Tell the muscles around my eyes to relax.
Those around my mouth to contract.
The tension around my heart to ease.
Please.
A new space for storage.
Recycle my memory with more courage.
For something else.
Because what my mind has flipped upright
through the tunnel that are my eyes
is not what I want to remember this by.
This journey so far.
Coated by layers of guilt.
Where can I place this damn blame.
Of others for their actions and non actions and words.
My mind's playing tricks again.
I tried to reboot.
But the only thoughts that were erased
were the ones I wanted to hold on to.
Restart
Retry
Re-this
Re-that.
I can't change what is in the past.
This I am sure of.
But I can change tomorrow, or at least how its perceived.
A brand new, mass produced mind is the key.


Friday, July 16, 2010

Trivia

LOCATION: Lebanon.
A conundrum of a country.
Where cars are made with expensive labels,
roads paved in cement,
noses remade with loans from banks $7 billion in debt.
Where homosexuality is illegal, probably because the legalization of it will burn 36% of the populations' closets to the ground, leaving no where to hide.
Where the capital, Beirut, is the epitome of a heterogeneous society. Not Melting nor confined to a Pot.
TIME: Wedged between the denial of yesterday and hope for tomorrow. No Present at All.
Not present at all.
We are caught in the inbetween. The space between flying and standing. The Almost place.
The time is almost noon.
The time has almost come for war.
The time was almost right for change.
time almost gave way to a new way of life.
The time has almost come for peace.
SIGHTSEEING: The Landmarks are no longer the ruins from every civilization that has come to existence.
Instead, we show you the best bars in town.
the best pubs in town.
the best places to smoke and drink.
To see and be seen.
The beaches, the women, and the statues of Jesus.
Twink? Bear? Jock? Queen?
come on down to _______ or El______ or even ________.
In the clubbing mood, find your way to ____ and dance the night away.
Wanna cruise the friendly resorts? take a dip into the cool waters at __ ___ ____.
Wanna mingle with the rich and famous ? get your D&G shades on and bounce your way into __ _____ resort.
warning: your actions and words come with warnings.

Conundrum
I fit in so well.
A conundrum I stand 5' 9'' and proud.

"Hey how was your trip? anything fun? any boys?... any women? did you hit the beaches? Ugh I am so jealous! Can I come next time? Have you heard from your ex or all your best friends? who am I kidding, how can you miss all the pictures and comments and blogs about moments and men in moments and men and their moments and men and moments and boys in men. Any Revelations? are you ready for new relations? any hook-ups? any one night stands? and potential biddies? How is your brother? and sister-in-law? how are your parents? and the house? did they fix the leak? how is your teta? did you come out to anyone new? how was the work you made? You always change when you come back from Lebanon. Why don't you want to come out with us anymore? why don't you want to drink ? or do drugs? or hook up? what kind of gay are you? snap snap snap snap. Girl. Gurl. GURL. GIRL. guhrl."
man.


Conundrum
I fit in so well.
A conundrum I stand 5' 9'' and proud.
In fake glasses and skinny jeans.
I fit into this society with ease.
A conundrum I stand 130 lbs.
I fit into your existence so well.
Humble and Cocky and everything else.






Sunday, May 16, 2010

Final thoughts ?

We all have one thing in common; we want to fix you.
For you are more broken than any fine porcelain we have ever seen.
And in a world that has been prescribed perfection, we find an artistic value in you, a form of refuge, which we blindly mistake for love.
- Isabelle

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

illuminate my loneliness

I will rest in solitude.
And like the moon
I will find comfort knowing that I illuminate your nights to help find the one
you truly belong to.
The distance between us gives rise to the tides of passion of which I can only be a witness of.
I have been cursed by the sun
I have been blessed by the stars
All this in my solitude.
I am a shield and a sword in this battle of love.
You are the soldier who's heart fights for heart
soul for soul
eternity forever with a true love...
All this in my solitude
A result of which gives hope to you.
Hope of a new start, far from me.
Well my love your wish came true.
Here I am, and there are you.
I sit in a throne of stars,
you rest in another's arms.
All this in my solitude.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

A Darker Shade Of Grey

A darker shade of gray
Today,
Tomorrow,
This evening I will follow, I will become.
Innocence falling
Sinful turf upon which I lay my,
Your,
Our,
We together are nothing but we.
Alone I be, surrounded
Within
Without
Whenever in doubt just pray
But it is the predator,
I fear,
I hate,
Therefore I am bate, to my own mind.
This limbo is a state,
A state that has been possessed,
Mine'd,
Singular,
It belongs to me
This darker shade of grey, I chose to be.
Willingly.